Your Radiance
by handa
Summary: KusaHitsu drabbles that are 500 words or less. About friendship, love, trust, and betrayal.
1. End of Our Beginning

**STOP!** Before you go any further this chapter has spoilers for 'Bleach: The DiamondDust Rebellion.' Or at least, what I think are spoilers.

**A/N:** I'm going to start writing down my KusaHitsu day-dreams here instead of keeping them in my head. That way I can keep better track. Oh yeah. And I ran into a wall with my other fic so hopefully this will help me out.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Tite Kubo's Bleach.

Word Count: 250  
POV: Hitsugaya's

* * *

It's over. Or at least, it nearly is.

I still need to land the final blow.

But in all honesty, I don't want to. It's not just that. It almost feels like… I can't.

It's always because of me isn't it? Your death, I mean. Soon to be 'deaths.' You don't deserve this. Someone else, please. But not from me.

Kusaka Soujirou, again I am the reason behind your end. It is agonizing for me to raise my zanpakutou. This blade that wove us together and then tore us apart. 

How can you look so ready?

Your eyes… I don't remember them being red. So red… 

Like blood. 

Kurosaki Ichigo, the one who also caused your weakened state is here. He is encouraging me to strike you down. Am I supposed to feel grateful towards him for his words? Or despise him for them? I don't know.

All I know is that I'm hesitating. And you know this.

A stranger, a friend, a lover, a rival, and now, an enemy. You are so much to me even now, Kusaka.

I hate that it ends this way. Again. 

I'm sorry.

Can you feel it as well? The tremors of reluctance that comes from Hyourinmaru as I swing my weapon down. 

And as your last words surround me… I regret. Don't speak to me as if we were still companions. Once again I don't deserve it. 

This is the final good-bye, Kusaka. You scatter and sparkle into the breeze.

Like diamond dust.


	2. Not Going to Happen

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Tite Kubo's Bleach.

Word Count: 410  
POV: Kusaka's

* * *

"I don't trust him."

"Who?" My voice sounds muffled. And it should be. I've buried my face once again into the pages of a book. It's a nice story. I should pass it along to Toushirou when I'm done.

He let's out an annoyed sigh. The one I know almost too well.

I guess I missed the first part of his speech.

So I put down the book and face him. I'm trying to perfect my apologetic smile these days. Toushirou is good practice since I tend to get him displeased a lot. So I try it out and… it doesn't work.

Oh well. Maybe some other time.

"Who?" I try again and lean towards him to make it seem like I really want to know. And I kind of do. To, you know, help him out.

And finish that book, of course.

"Ichimaru Gin!" Toushirou throws his hands up in exasperation and I can't help but grin. He's such a character when it comes to his rants.

"Oh?" I pick up some of the papers that are scattered around the desk. We were able to finish all our assignments early that day. So I guess it gave Toushirou enough time to speak.

"He's strange. It's almost like… we're going to be enemies."

At this I chuckle and Toushirou instantly shoots me his trademark glare. "Really, Toushirou. He's a respectable taichou of the Gotei 13." I pick my book back up. Our conversation is almost at its end. "You'll get along fine with him."

"But… !" 

"Listen. Ichimaru-taichou and you becoming enemies would be like…" I tilt my head to the side and wonder what I could say. "… would be like me trying to destroy Seireitei or something." I smile to show it wasn't going to happen.

Toushirou just keeps on glaring.

But I can tell he's easing up on the subject. So I crack open my book and scan the pages to see if I can find where I had left off.

"Kusaka?" 

Oh darn, I had thought we were finished. "Yeah?"

"Why _that_ situation?"

I glance over, puzzled, at Toushirou from the top of my book. I thought it was pretty obvious.

"Because it'll never happen."

Toushirou mutters as he fumbles with his share of the assignments. "… It better not."

I shrug and start reading. I've found my place.

Toushirou worries too much. I should let him read this book.

When I finish it, of course. 


	3. Sharing the Same

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Tite Kubo's Bleach.

Word Count: 300  
POV: Kusaka's

* * *

Class just finished and I need to hurry. Toushirou hates it when I keep him waiting.

"Hey, Soujirou! Wait up, man!"

"Yeah, hold on!"

I really don't have time for this. But I fake a smile and ask.

"What do you need?"

I need to make this quick. These two guys from my previous class aren't important. I barely even know them. Toushirou is important. And he's growing impatient, wherever he is. I can honestly feel it.

"Wanna hang out with us today? Maybe help out on some assignments…?"

Ah, they want to copy my work. Figures. But it can't be helped. I _am_ ranked at number two in the Shinigami Academy. Naturally idiots would be flocking to me.

"Sorry, but I'm busy today."

One of them scoffs. I know why.

"Gonna be busy with that Hitsugaya kid again? Man, Soujirou, you need to be around people your own age."

I can hear what he holds back. But I ask anyway.

"And why's that?"

The pair seems uncomfortable now. I am pleased.

"Everyone knows, Soujirou. They know you're trying to seduce the kid."

At this point I turn my back on them. I've heard the rumors as well. But Toushirou and I are just friends. I'm not 'seducing' him into anything.

"I'm late. I suppose you'll have to find someone else to cheat off of."

"Soujirou! We're just trying to warn you! You aren't gonna get very far with him! That kid's got no emotion! He has a heart made outta ice!"

I ignore them and soon the sound of their shuffling feet grows distant. I allow myself to look back, over my shoulder, at their retreating backs.

A heart made out of ice, huh? I didn't mind.

Because I had one too.

I was just better at hiding it.


	4. Allow the Challenges I

**A/N:** There is a part II to this.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Tite Kubo's Bleach.

Word Count: 290  
POV: Hitsugaya's

* * *

It's become an everyday ritual for us.

After classes are done, we sit underneath the large oak tree at the back of the academy. I think it's a waste of time. But Kusaka insists we need to take breaks.

To 'refresh' our minds.

But I bring textbooks with me anyway.

Kusaka always shakes his head in disapproval whenever I bring the books along. But I know he doesn't mind.

Because he knows I'll be bored when he drifts off to sleep.

It's always the same.

Kusaka dozing comfortably underneath the tree's shade.

And me frantically scribbling notes with my back against the tree's trunk.

I know I'm an over-achiever. But I can't help it. I need to be one step ahead of Kusaka.

Because we're rivals too.

I am slightly envious though. Kusaka looks so peaceful while he sleeps. As if nothing could ever disturb him.

That's why I try to wake him without actually waking him. It's a challenge, I know. But I need to find some sort of entertainment when my work is done.

The first day, I tried sprinkling grass blades on his face.

He barely stirred.

The second day, I 'accidentally' dropped my heavy books beside his head.

He only yawned and rolled over to his side.

The third day, I tried with his hair. Pulling it softly, twirling strands of it around my finger, and messing it up.

He just sighed and went on sleeping.

Today, I find a small beetle wandering the side of the oak tree's roots. I pick it up and place it on Kusaka's forehead.

Then I wait.

The beetle doesn't do much. It perches there and doesn't move.

Then it spreads its wings and flies.

My luck is terrible sometimes.


End file.
